On Sunday evening I prayed, and stayed up late watching television, until I could not keep my eyes open. I had been feeling very old and lonely these past few months with all of this traveling, camping in tents, and sleeping on the cold hard ground, and not really understanding why except that I was order too by the Lord. And now here I am half way around the world, in Israel, wondering, "Why"? Then I start to wonder. When was the Lord going to give me that special woman, and wondering if it was my friend from many years ago, I remembered looking into the mirror a few days ago, and not liking what I saw. All I could see, was one tired fat numb old man, (though I don’t really believe I am old), seeking God, with a HUNGER that my flesh could not understand.

After taking a deep breath, I tried to focus and began to pray. I said to the Lord, "Where I am going to find this special partner you have been telling me about all of these years? For if I was a woman, I wouldn’t want me. And look at my hair or what is left of it. It is all white. And most people think I am nuts, and should be locked up! So Lord, since there is no one here but you and I, please give more hair and a righteous woman who can help me through this crazy Christian walk! (I guess after writing this, we are not alone anymore.)" So after my other nightly prayers - for the people on the e-mail list, family, friends, and people who are seriously sick, I fell asleep.

Then during the early morning hours, I was suddenly awaken. I was sleeping on my back with my hands at my side, and this incredible force bound my hands and paralyzed my body to the bed. All that ran through my mind was, "Lord - I am in trouble. Something has me frozen to the bed. HELP ME!!!" No matter how hard I tried to move my body, it would not move. What was so strange, I kept having this image of Daniel. When the Angel of the Lord appeared to him, and he fell down on his face in fear - kept running through my mind.

I felt a woman’s hands holding my two wrists. I also felt this peace. The whole room was filled with this incredible power. I still did not know if this presence was friend or foe. But I could feel the smallness of the two hands that were holding my wrists. And I could not see anyone.

So I asked, "Who is this?"

And a voice said with power and authority, "This is Ruth."

At first I did not know if it was a demonic force, or some Angel named, Ruth. I struggle at first for I was so startled. Then the Ruth of the Bible came to my mind or my spirit. I do not know which. Also, slowly I was able to raise both my hands, with these spiritual woman’s hands holding on to my wrists.

So I said to myself, "If this is Ruth I can say, I love Jesus, I love Jesus, I love Jesus."

So I kept praising the Lord Jesus Christ of Nazareth, over and over. So with both my hands raised in the spirit, I began to wave them, and I kept praising, and moving, and waving them into the air, with the attached other hands. I could also feel this heat, or warmth come upon my body. Just as suddenly as they appeared they disappeared, and my hands fell back to the bed. This really scared me!

But all I can say, "I love you Jesus Christ of Nazareth. I give you all the praise and the honor, and the glory - Now and forever and ever. Amen."

Comments:

I Remembered that I had prayed earlier to the Lord about my old feeling body and my white hair. Well, two interesting things happened when I got home. My mother called me early Sunday morning to see if I got back safe, and she told me had a VERY, VERY vivid dream during my Israel mission trip. She told me that one night she had this dream of seeing me in my twenties, and that I looked very young. She said what caught her attention was my hair. That I had such a full head of very black hair with a big wave on one side. That - then she knew I was safe from the bombing they had in Jerusalem. She said it was so real that she awoke my dad and told him her dream, and that she could not go back to sleep that evening.

Then that day my brother Ted came over and late that same evening we were talking, and he said, "You know Ray, I had a vivid dream when you were in Israel. I saw you in this dream and you were a little baby, and someone was holding in his arms, but what was so unusual; you had a full head of dark brown hair with a wave to one side. The dream was so realistic it woke me up." What are the odds of two people having the same kind of dream.

A short note my daughter Cynthia gave me after reading my comments notes.

7-27-97 at 8:00 AM.

My father telephoned me, direct from Israel, to inform me that there had been two bombings in Israel a few hours earlier. He told me that I would hear about it from the news media sometime that evening. He also told me that he had been at the place where the bombs went off, and had left that bombed area two days prior.

That morning, I phoned my grandmother to let her know that my father was okay, and not to worry, because the news media was informing the world about the bombing. My father was concerned that the news would give my Grandmother grief.

When my Grandmother and I were talking that morning, she told me that she had a clear dream of my father, the night before. My Grandmother told me in her dream that she told my father, that she was very worried about him leaving the country. Ray (my father) told her (in her dream) not to worry Mother, I am okay I’ll be fine., I m here for you. Please don’t worry. I am coming home. (My Grandmother told me that his looks were like when he was young, when he was newly married to my mother) She was shocked to see him so young. And his hair was very dark. After her dream, she felt much better. And her dream gave her great comfort. (She told me this in her own words).

Siku ya Jumapili jioni mimi niliomba, na kukaa hadi usiku wa manane nikiwa ninaangalia runinga mpaka niliposhindwa kufungua macho kwa ajili ya usingizi. Mimi nimekuwa nikijisikia kuwa mzee sana na mpweke katika miezi michache hii iliyopita pamoja na safari hizi, kupiga kambi kwenye mahema, kulala chini kwenye ardhi ambayo ni ngumu na baridi na bila kuelewa kwa hasa hasa maana yake ni nini zaidi ya kuwa Bwana ameniagiza kufanya hivyo. Na sasa niko hapa nikiwa umbali wa nusu ya kuzunguka dunia hapa Israeli, nikiwa na jaribu kutafakari, ni “kwa nini?” Kisha mimi nikaanza kujiuliza. Hivi ni lini Bwana atakapoenda kunipa yule mwanamke maalum, na kuanza kuwaza kama huyo mwanamke ni mmoja wa marafiki zanu wa siku nyingi, mimi nakumbuka kuwa niliwahi kujiangalia kwenye kioo siku chache zilizopita na sikupenda kile nilicho kiona. Yote niliyo yaona yalikuwa ni mtu fulani ambaye ni mnene, aliyechoka na asiye na furaha (japo mimi siamini kama mimi ni mzee kweli), akiwa anamtafuta Mungu, kwa NJAA ambayo mwili wangu unashindwa kuelewa.

Baada ya kuvuta pumzi kwa nguvu, mimi nikajaribu kuweka umakini wangu tena na kuanza kuomba. Mimi nilimwambia Bwana, "Hivi ni wapi nitakapoenda kumpata huyo mwenza (mchumba) wangu maalum ambaye umekuwa ukinieleza kwa muda huu wote? Kwa maana kama mimi ningelikuwa mwanamke, mimi nisingelimtaka mwanaume kama mimi. Na hasa nikiangalia kwenye nywele zangu au nywele zilizobaki kichwani mwangu. Nywele zangu zote hivi sasa ni nyeupe. Na watu wengi wananidhania kuwa mimi ni mwehu, na ningelifaa kufungwa mahala! Kwa hiyo Bwana, kwa vile hakuna mtu mwingine hapa ila Wewe na mimi, nakuomba unipe nywele zaidi na mwanamke mwadilifu ambaye anaweza kunisaidia katika safari yangu hii ya uwendawazi wa Kikristo! (nadhani baada ya kuandika haya, Sisi siyo peke yetu tena).” Kwa hiyo baada ya maombi yangu mengine ya kawaida ya kila usiku – kwa ajili ya watu walioko kwenye mtandao wangu wa barua pepe, familia yangu, marafiki zangu, na watu ambao ni wagonjwa sana, mimi nililala.

Kisha nyakati za saa za mapema asubuhi, mimi mara niliamshwa kwa ghafla. Wakati huo mimi nilikuwa nimelala kwa chali na mikono yangu ikiwa iko pembeni mwangu, na nguvu fulani ya ajabu ikafunga mikono yangu na kuushikilia mwili wangu pale kitandani. Kilicho nijia mara; kwenye akili yangu ilikuwa, “Bwana – mimi niko matatani. Kuna kitu kimenishikilia kitandani mwangu. UNISAIDIE MIMI BWANA!!!” Bila kujali nilitumia nguvu kiasi gani mwili wangu ulikuwa hautikisiki. Kitu kilicho kuwa ni cha ajabu, mimi nilikuwa na patwa na maono ya Danieli. Wakati ule Malaika wa Bwana alipo mtokea, naye akawa ameanguka chini kwenye uso wake kwa uwoga – mawazo hayo ndiyo yaliyokuwa yanapita kwenye mawazo yangu.

Mimi nilikuwa najisikia kama mikono ya mwanamke fulani yameyashikilia mikono yangu. Pia nikawa najisikia mwenye amani fulani. Nyumba nzima ilikuwa imejaa kwa hisia ya nguvu ya aina fulani. Mpaka hapo mimi nilikuwa sijui kama uwepo ulioko humo ulikuwa ni wa adui au wa rafiki. Lakini mimi nilikuwa naweza kuhisi mikono hiyo miwili ambayo ilikuwa inasikika kuwa midogo ya mwanamke huyo akiwa ameshika mikono yangu. Nami nilikuwa nashindwa kuona zaidi ya hayo.

Kwa hiyo mimi nikauliza, "Ni nani huyo?"

Na sauti ikasema kwa nguvu na mamlaka, "Huyu ni Ruthi."

Hapo mwanzoni nilikuwa sijui kama huyo alikuwa ni pepo au kama ni Malaika anayeitwa Ruthi. Mimi mwanzoni nilikuwa ninajifurukuta kwa maana nilikuwa nimestushwa sana. Mara yule Ruthi wa kwenye Biblia alinijia kwenye mawazo yangu au kwenye roho yangu. Mimi sijui ni yupi (kati yao). Pole pole nikawa naweza kunyanyua mikono yangu yote miwili tena, na huku mikono ya huyo mwanamke yakiwa ameshikiliwa Mikono yangu yote miwili.

Hivyo nikajisemeshea mwenyewe kuwa, "Kama kweli huyu ni Ruthi (yule wa kwenye Biblia) naweza kusema, ‘mimi nampenda Yesu, mimi nampenda Yesu, mimi nampenda Yesu’."

Kwa hiyo mimi nikaendelea kumsifu Bwana Yesu Kristo wa Nazareti, tena na tena. Huku mikono yangu yote miwili ikiwa imenyanyuliwa juu katika ulimwengu wa kiroho nakuanza kuyapungia juu, na kuendelea kusifu, huku nikijizungusha na kuendelea kupungia mikono yangu hiyo hewani, pamoja na mikono ile iliyo shikilia mikono yangu. Nilikuwa na weza kuhisi joto fulani au moto ukiujia mwili wangu. Kama ilivyo kuja kwa ghafla ikaondoka kwa ghfla na mara Mikono yangu ikaanguka kitandani. Jambo hili lilinitisha sana!

Lakini yote ninayoweza kusema ni kuwa, "Mimi nakupenda Wewe Yesu wa Nazareti. Mimi ninakupa wewe, sifa zote na heshima, na utukufu – Sasa na hata milele na milele. Amina."

Ilani:

Mimi nakumbuka kuwa nilikuwa na Sali nikimwomba Bwana hapo awali kuhusu mwili wangu uliokuwa unazeeka na hali ya nywele zangu ambazo zimekuwa nyeupe. Naam, mambo mawili ya ajabu yalitokea pale niliporudi nyumbani. Mama yangu alinipigia simu mapema siku ya Jumapili kutaka kujua kama nimerudi salama. Naye akaniambia kuwa yeye aliota ndoto ILIYOKUWA HALISI SANA wakati nilipokuwa kwenye safari yangu hiyo ya Israeli. Yeye aliniambia kuwa usiku mmoja yeye aliota ndoto ambako aliniona mimi nikiwa kijana wa miaka ishirini hivi, nami nilikuwa ninaonekana kijana sana. Yeye alisema kilicho mvutia kwenye macho yake kilikuwa ni hali ya nywele zangu. Yeye alisema katika ndoto hiyo yeye alikuwa na kichwa kilicho jaa manywele myeusi na akiwa amepiga wii upande mmoja. Na ya kuwa – kutokana na hayo yeye alitambua kuwa mimi nilikuwa niko salama kule Yerusalemu. Yeye alisema kuwa ilikuwa ndoto iliyokuwa halisi kiasi ambacho ilibidi amwamshe mzee wangu na kumweleza kuhusu ndoto yake hiyo, na ya kuwa yeye alishindwa kupata tena usingizi jioni ile.

Kisha siku ile ile kaka yangu aitwaye Ted alikuja kuniona jioni yake na tukawa tanaongea naye, ndipo yeye akasema, "Wajua nini Ray, mimi nilikuwa na ndoto halisi kweli kweli wakati wewe ulipokuwa kule Israeli. Mimi nilikuona kwenye ndoto hiyo ukiwa mtoto mdogo, na mtu fulani alikuwa amekupakata mikononi mwake, lakini kile kilichokuwa sicho cha kawaida kilikuwa kule wewe kuwa na kichwa cha mtu mzima na huku ukiwa unywe za rangi ya udongo hivci kichwani mwako na huku umekata wei upande mmoja. Ndoto hiyo ilikuwa halisi kiasi ambacho iliniamsha.” Sijui tukio hilo lilikuwa ni tukio la namna gani kwa watu wawili kuota ndoto ambazo zinafanana sana.

Taarifa fupi ambayo binti yangu Synthia aliyoitoa baada ya kusoma ilani yangu hiyo ya hapo juu.

27-7-97 saa 2:00 asubuhi.

Baba yangu alinipigia simu mmoja kwa mmoja kutoka nchi ya Israeli, ili kunijulisha kuwa kulikuwa na milipiko ya mabomu huko Israeli masaa machache iliyopita. Kwa kuwa anatarajie habari hizo zitatangazwa kwenye vyombo vya habari muda wowote jioni ile, yeye alitaka kunieleza kuwa yeye yuko salama na kuwa siku mbili zilizopita naye mwenyewe alikuwa kwenye eneo hilo hilo ambako mabomu hayo yalipo lipuka.

Asubuhi ile, mimi nilimpigia simu bibi yangu ili kumjulisha kuwa baba yangu alikuwa salama, na kwa hiyo asiwe na wasi wasi, kwa sababu vyombo vya habari vinaanza kutoa taarifa kuhusu tukio hilo la mabomu. Baba yangu alikuwa na wasiwasi kuwa taarifa hizo za habari zingeliweza kumstua na kumsikitisha bibi.

Bibi yangu na mimi tulikuwa tukiongea asubuhi ile, yeye aliniambia kuwa aliota ndoto iliyokuwa wazi ya kuhusu baba yangu, usiku uliopita. Bibi yangu aliniambia katika ndoto yake ile kuwa yeye alimwambia baba yangu kuwa alikuwa na wasi wasi sana juu yake kwa kuondoka nchini. Ray (baba yangu) alimwambia yeye (katika ndoto yake) usijali mama, mimi niko mzima na salama, mimi niko hapa kwa ajili yako. Tafadhali usiwe na wasi wasi. Mimi nitarudi salama nyumbani. (Bibi yangu aliniambia kuwa sura yake ni kama pale alipokuwa bado kijana, pale alipokuwa wameoana na mama yangu) yeye alishangazwa sana kumwona yeye baba akiwa bado kijana kiasi hicho. Na nywele zake zilikuwa nyeusi sana. Na baada ya ndoto hiyo yeye alianza kujisikia vizuri. Na ndoto yake hiyo ilimpa amani kubwa sana. (yeye aliniambia mimi hayo kwa maneno yake mwenyewe).